jock review – NUT HUT by Warrior
May 14th, 2009 by Alex Moist | Posted in Gen. Discussion, ice hockey, Review, Self defense | 10,586 viewsIn the spirit of the Lord Stanley Cup playoffs – we at JockJoose International will be reviewing a number of Athletic Supporters – AKA Jocks, Cups, Jockstraps with Cup, Dick Protectors, etc. The fact the NHL’s championship trophy is actually a cup and the fact all hockey players wear cups is no coincidence. The cup itself was actually worn by Lord Stanley himself when he played in his 3rd season with the Hartford Whalers.
Our first specimen is the Nut HUT by Warrior.
Nut Hut
Initial reactions: The “cute” rhyming name caught our immediate attention. How fun, it’s a hut for your nuts. This made us very skeptical for actual performance as most huts really suck and offer little to no protection, thank fully it was not named the lean-to. Also since Warrior is a quasi fake hockey company which makes terrible sticks and relies more on Lacrosse – its hard to know what you’re gonna get. Is this made to stop a puck or a round ball? Could the dick covering portion of the Nut Hut stand up against the sharp edges of a black hockey puck and a stick in the groin?
The try on: Well at first the Nut Hut felt a bit snug due to the spandex nature of the equipment. This was being tried on without any undergarments below. Sometimes folks would wear a spandex ish boxerbriefs beneath. but why would you wear spandex beneath spandex unless you are a woman at 1980′s aerobics class After about 4 minutes they felt fine – you could feel it was there, which is comforting. The cup itself held the nuts nicely – a little firm but reasonable No immediate discomfort.
The Skate: Well after a few circle drills the groin equipment felt fine, However after 17 minutes of goal line to blue line sprints the Nut hut began to chaffe a bit. If you own Gold Bond- i’d suggest using it as a lube.
The Protection: Well i had my friend/co worker take a bunch of wristers (due to accuracy at hitting the target)at the Nut Hut – stood up well to those and the pucks deflected at a very fast pace. This could be ok for a forward looking for a breakaway, but bad news for a goaltender looking to minimize rebounds. Next came a snapshot that hit off my shinpads. The cup held up nicely on that. A backhand was next and that hit my left shoulder- cup OK. Next was a slapshot – it caromed off of the left side and did not feel spectacular. I then had second thoughts because this is probably only made for Lacrosse and is just a HUT figured i did not want to chance it any longer and potentially neuter myself.
The breakdown: This was a marginal piece of sporting goods. I really don’t recommend- it’s too much of a new age piece of equipment that looks pretty faggy. The only people i could see buying it would be soccer mom’s that think the name is cute or the Ultimate Warrior who is just buying for the brand namesake, but he probably wouldnt use it due to having completely shrunken balls due to excessive ’roid use. No real hockey player would ever buy such a queerly named thing – especially one made by a quasi fake hockey company- Seriously when Mission sounds like way more of a legit hockey company you have a problem.
*** stars out of 8 stars
May 14th, 2009 at 11:19 am
killer review, you really covered all the bases on protection.
warrior will never be a legitimate hockey company
May 14th, 2009 at 11:25 am
oh man will this help me when skiing the GS?
May 14th, 2009 at 11:29 am
I’d suggest a skiing specific jock such as the Rossignol Defender
May 14th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
[...] the most goals after two periods of 30 minutes wins. Basically an indoor soccer/roundball hybrid. Jockstraps plays a large part in the defensive/protection portion of the [...]
May 14th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
i usually wear a nut bra
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cALMqlFUebI
May 14th, 2009 at 1:10 pm
i never wear a cup – im way more agile
May 14th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
October 18th, 2009 at 2:34 am
Faggy? Alex Moist sounds pretty faggy to me. Go dry your puss.
April 5th, 2010 at 6:19 pm
I pray Wayne Rooney is ok for the world cup. Someone told me he might be fixed by next week but I don’t know whether to believe it. Anybody got any inside info?
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