Tiger wins own tournament, A. Kim told to lose
July 6th, 2009 by why be athletic | Posted in golf | 101 viewsTiger Woods shot a 67 on the final day of his own tournament, the AT&T National at Congressional, to finish at thirteen under and take home the trophy. Sound fishy?
JockJoose thought so too and sent our golf correspondent, Putty McDraw out to get the real scoop.
“Before the round, I was hitting some balls and up came Tiger. He told me that if I won, then Nike would dump me and he’d send me on the first train to the Nationwide Tour,” said final day pairing partner Anthony Kim. “I thought we were buddies. He also mentioned something about some Asian death code.”
“Tiger told me that if I played in his tournament, then he would bench press me into oncoming traffic,” noted Phil Mickelson.
Lucas Glover, who won the US Open a couple of weeks back remarked that Tiger didn’t even have to tell him to lose. “After I won the US Open, Tiger asked me if I liked my knees as they were. He was holding a lead pipe and had a crazy look in his eyes.”
Woods was last seen in the parking lot of the Congressional stuffing Hunter Mahan in his trunk. Found at a highway rest stop six hours later in Ohio, Mahan said, “I didn’t get the memo. I will never shoot below par on the final day again. I enjoy living.”
July 6th, 2009 at 10:35 am
Its obvious he cheated – he cant let people see him lose his own tourny – i think there was footage of tiger kicking his ball for a better lie